Need to Remember
by daenabenjen42
Summary: Written for the 2011 Fic Gift Exchange...
1. Chapter 1

Title: Need To Remember  
Characters: Jag, Jaina, and Mara  
Genre: Drama  
Disclaimer: I borrowed.  
Notes: This was written in response to a fic gift request for the 2011 Fic Gift Exchange... and I got the title from a song lyric. Not sure what the song is, exactly. Request involved Jag having amnesia and there needing to be a kiss and a stabbing. Really.

* * *

They watched the dirty and disheveled man mumble incoherently to himself for long minutes before the woman sighed and turned tired eyes on her aunt and Jedi Master. "They can't be serious."

Her aunt handed her a piece of flimsy with a sigh. "I had them check the results three times, Jaina. That really is Jag. Your guess is as good as mine for how he ended up like this."

Jaina's frown deepened as she watched him, only just beginning to feel the familiarness of the man on the other side of the transparisteel. "He'd never allow himself to get that filthy and unkempt, Aunt Mara."

"DNA doesn't lie," Mara reminded her. Jaina nodded, turned on her heel, and started for the door. "Where are you going?"

"To talk to him."

* * *

"Need to remember," the man muttered over and over again. "Need to. Need to remember. Remember..."

"Remember what?" a female voice asked, causing him to blink and look to find a dark-haired woman watching him with brown, concerned eyes.

There was something about the expression on her face that drew him in, made him want to stand up, but... all he could do was sit at the table in the little room with the one-way window (he wasn't sure how he knew that the mirror wasn't actually a mirror, but he did) and stared at her. "I... don't know. But need to. It's important."

She sat down opposite him, put a flimsy on the table between them. "Here's something to remember, then. This is you: Jagged Fel."

He glanced down at the flimsy, noting the holo of the clean-cut man in the uniform. Intrigued, he reached out and traced the holo with a finger. "Jagged."

"Jag."

The shortened version of his name made him flinch and a memory of a woman with blue skin, laughing in a way that gave him chills and sitting on top of him surfaced. He shook his head and began to rock back and forth. "Need to remember. Need..."

Her hand on his arm drew him back to the present. "That's what we'll do. Help you. But you have to let us. Understood?"

He nodded slowly. "Blue. Laughing. On top."

She frowned. "Blue?"

"Head tails." And then he grabbed her, pulled her closer across the small table, and kissed her. When they parted, she was looking at him in surprise. And pain. "Message."

They both stared at the dagger sticking out of her hand and into the surface of the table. "Jag?"

"Message," he repeated and looked away.

Suddenly, another woman, this one with red hair, rushed into the room and pulled them apart, gently prying the knife out of the table, but not pulling it out of the younger one's hand as she did so. "Jaina, go get that taken care of. Now." Jaina nodded and, wincing, left the room.

Jag looked up at the red haired woman, confused. "I..."

"I know," the woman told him without malice. "You don't know. You don't even know what you just did or why you did it. Have any more weapons?"

Her question was met with silence as he continued to look up at her blankly.

* * *

An hour or two later, hand now heavily bandaged, Jaina rejoined her aunt at the observation window. "He didn't mean to do that."

"No," Mara said after a long moment of contemplation. "He didn't. Had two more knives on his person, too. How's the hand?"

"I'll live."

Mara glanced at her. "Someone wanted you to get a message. I think we both can figure out what the message was, don't you?"

Jaina nodded slowly. "Yes." She stared for long minutes at the man on the other side of the one-way window, now rocking again and muttering incoherently once more. "I want my husband back, Aunt Mara."

Mara pulled her into an uncharacteristic hug. "I know you do, Jaina. I know."

On the other side of the one-way window, Jagged Fel continued to mumble to himself. "Need to remember... need..."


	2. Need for Contact, part one

**Title**: Need For Contact  
**Characters**: Jaina, Jag, Ben...  
**Timeframe**: ...would have been the NJO, were this cannon...  
**Notes**: Written for the Mods Moving Challenge and a continuation of "Need to Remember" from the Fic Gift Exchange. This is a prequel.

* * *

It was quiet in the bedroom as he packed clothes into a bag in preparation for his mission. He knew she wanted to speak to him, but about what was still unclear. They'd been in the middle of breakfast when he'd gotten orders to report for a mission, and that had been that. Finally closing the bag and unable to delay departure any longer, he turned to her. "Guess I'm off, then."

She simply looked at him for a long moment, as if to drink in the sight of him, before nodding once. "I guess you are."

That was an odd response if there ever was one. "Is something wrong, Jaina?"

"Why would anything be wrong, Jag?" She crossed the room to his side and embraced him. "Nothing is. I just don't think this mission is necessary. And you haven't been home that long."

He stared down at the woman in his arms. Something was different, but he couldn't put his finger on what that might be, nor did he think she'd tell him right this minute. "I'll be back in two weeks."

"Promise?"

"Yes, Jaina. I promise."

She kissed him soundly on the lips, then smiled demurely up at him. "I'll be holding you to that. So will your son."

That brought up another concern. Their son, who wasn't even a year old yet. Who had uttered his first word, "Da-flee!", only yesterday. "I..."

She put a finger to his lips, silencing him. "Like you said... two weeks."

Only with her subtle encouragement was he able to leave the apartment in moderately good spirits.

* * *

Three weeks had come and gone, and now she held in her hands a piece of flimsy. Three weeks, a week longer than he was supposed to be gone. Slowly, she leaned against the wall and sank to the floor, still holding the flimsy.

On it was a message relayed to Coruscant across the holonet which had used a secured encryption code. She stared at it, almost unable to read it, but lacking the motivation to throw it as far away from her person as possible.

The longer she sat there, the more Jaina refused to believe that the love of her life was dead. She'd have felt it, if that were the case. Right?

* * *

She wasn't sure how long she sat there on the floor, clutching a piece of flimsy, but all of a sudden the door a couple feet to her right opened and all three of her cousins came in. Jaina stared up at them. "What...?

Ben pursed his lips tightly as his sisters hauled Jaina up off the floor. "We just heard."

Jaina blinked in confusion at the three of them as the flimsy was taken out of her hand. "But..."

"No buts, Jaina." Soon enough, she was seated on the couch. "And you shouldn't be alone."

"Ben, I'm..." one of her cousins cleared their throat, effectively cutting her off. "What, Ri-Ri?"

"Say you're fine, and I'll actually let Ben give you a physical here and now." Startled silence greeted that statement and Jaina could only stare at her. "Tally? Go find her something to eat and check on the munchkin." The youngest of her three concerned cousins simply nodded and left to do as requested while Ri-Ri sat down next to Jaina. "And now you listen to me. We'll find him."

Jaina looked to the flimsy in Ben's hand. "We will?"

"Yes," Ben told her as he sat down on her other side. "We will. They know the general area where he went missing."

Jaina rolled her eyes. "Right. Like that helps!"

Ri-Ri's eyes went distant for a moment. "Everything helps, Jaina. Everything."

Jaina gestured for the flimsy, but Ben did not hand it back to her. "Please?"

"No." Then his eyes widened as he sensed something... "Oh. Did he know before he left?" At Jaina's blank expression, Ben sighed. "That you're...?"

Getting what he meant, finally, Jaina shook her head. "No. I didn't want to distract him, and it was only supposed to be a short mission. He was supposed to be back a week ago."

Ben nodded slowly, then took her in his arms and hugged her. A moment later, Ri-Ri joined them in the hug.


End file.
